You put it where?!

After the seriousness of the last couple of posts, it's probably time for a bit of light-heartedness (there is some of it where being a pregnant bloke is concerned!). As you'll have read before, SWMBO and I were seeing a fertility specialist. Once we got ourselves pregnant, our fertility specialist decided that SWMBO needed some hormonal help "just to be on the safe side". Evidently there weren't going to be enough hormones flying around over the coming weeks, and I needed to be punished for something bad that I"d done in a previous life.

The hormonal help came in the form of a drug called Crinone and it's given as a pessary (just google it, preferably with "safe search" turned on and not from a work computer). Now, I like to think of myself as a 'new man'. I'm sensitive to SWMBO's needs and realise that she has to do certain things, but sending me to pick these up is akin to sending me to the supermarket to pick up a box of Tampax, it just shouldn't be done!


So anyway, there I am at the fertility clinic again, hopefully for the last time (I mean that in the nicest possible way, the girls there - doesn't seem to be a male-dominated industry - were absolutely fantastic to both me and SWMBO) and the conversation went something like this:

SYB: Hi, I'm here to pick up the stuff for SWMBO
Receptionist: Stuff?
SYB: Yes, you know. The stuff.
Receptionist (to nurse in next room): THERE'S A BLOKE HERE TO PICK UP THE PESSARIES FOR SWMBO!
Nurse: Come in SYB, lovely to see you again *shuts door*
Nurse: Now, let me show you how to use these.

At this point I was wondering what the hell was going on. I was only sent there to pick up some drugs. I didn't know I was going to be shut into a room with a female nurse who was going to show me how to use a pessary. Fortunately, it was just a verbal demonstration, but you would've thought that the drug manufacturers would've put an Ikea-like cartoon on the packet showing how to use them to save us blokes some embarrassment!

Something I learned from this experience: When somebody gives you instructions to pass on to somebody else, for the love of all things holy take notes. If you don't, you might miss out passing on some rather important information...