So I'm pregnant - The third (and final!) prequel

You know what? I'd actually have given my left bollock to someone if it meant that SWMBO could've gotten pregnant sooner. Having spoken to a couple of medical professionals, this course of action isn't recommended. I tell ya though, I've fondled by balls enough to know which one's working and which is the slacker.

So anyway, I've offered strange women samples of my semen and announced it to a packed laboratory, I've had my GP try to have a two-way conversation about semen analysis results while I'm in an open plan office, I've found out that my handle on bubhub is entirely appropriate and SWMBO has had to have surgery, drugs and more blood tests than you can shake a big needle at. What else can happen? Oh yeah, IVF.


Back when I first started my pot filling endeavours we were given a choice of fertility clinics to go to. One that was a couple of doors down from my work and one that wasn't. As we weren't exactly going public with the whole IVF thing, we chose the latter. Given the result we got a while later we think this was the right choice.

So off we went to wave this infertility b*tch good bye. Then I found something out. It's not that easy. There was I, the simple bloke thinking that with all of the miracles that modern medicine can perform, getting SWMBO up the duff would just be a matter of popping some pills, providing another sample, using a turkey baster and be done with it. Oh, were it that simple.

There's drugs to take, scans to have, injections to be given, scans to have, hormones to deal with, scans to have, eggs to be picked up, scans to have, injections to be given, bloods to be taken, eggs to be fertilised, scans to have, eggs to be deposited, waiting to be done. Anything can go wrong at any of the preceding stages and there's nothing that you, I or somebody who knows what they're doing can do about it. Oh, and your sole practical contribution is masturbating into a pot. Again.

So, we psyched ourselves up for IVF, SWMBO started taking the drugs to kick off her first IVF cycle and after taking the drugs for about a week she was late and decided to POAS for the last time. The rest as they say is history. Nothing like leaving it to the last minute, eh? Somebody out there has a sense of humour.